above image© The Estate of Francis Bacon, all rights reserved, and DACS, 2008
My artistic life is very much an internal one. It’s centered in how I feel, how I want to express myself: how I want to paint the picture of my observations, the lessons I’ve learned, the struggles I’ve had. At least this is true for the writing part of my life- this record “TRUE” was written after this fashion- living a full everyday life and then bringing that experience home to write about it.
The experience, those feelings, are infolded into the craft- built into the songs, and hopefully listeners can feel the arc of my experience, my meaning, my feelings, when the song is heard.
It’s interesting to me that this seems to be the only way anything elegant is made- by a distinct awareness of one’s own thoughts and feelings- and a single minded effort to brings those meanings to hand:
’self-expression’.
Earlier in my life, I spent a good deal of time trying to attract attention, trying to make an opportunity, trying to show what I had not fully developed. I didn’t reach those I’d hoped to reach, I had made no permanent impression, because I had yet to fully impress myself. I had yet to go to the depths of my own art and stay there.
How could my work attract it’s other half- YOU, if I hadn’t built a fire with it? How could you know? How would you find me amongst all the others?
If I am trying to be heard before my work is done- then I don’t have much to offer then, do I? My work isn’t finished.
So, I’ll offer this as a lesson learned: if you want to be heard-in ANY endeavor- turn INWARD and master your effort. Become willing to be alone and grow your desire into a full fledged bonfire. First turn IN, and then then out, and things will happen in the proper sequence.
There will be no premature exposure, as I experienced, no dropping the ball, as I experienced- because everything will have been done in its proper order. I was unprepared as a young artist-
I had so much to learn about self mastery- still learning this- but I see it in so many great artists that I learn from.
But if you wonder what’s next ’cause nothing’s happening— turn your back to the outside.
TURN IN.
Love you.
C
